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I believe that our society encourages many individuals to externalize responsibility for every facet of daily life outward. For instance, we may hear people blame traffic for the reason they are considerably late for everything, ignoring the fact that they leave later than they should and there was no significant change in traffic volume and patterns when they make this claim. My personal favorite for my own self-justification is projecting blame on the tempting nature of certain food, rather than accepting blame for me not choosing the healthy option when I gain weight.
Just because there is an excuse does not mean it is the reason. There is always a choice in any event that we could make to improve a situation or make matters worse. Always a perspective of how we can take greater agency over the outcomes in our life rather than believing that everything is up to fate. Everything happens for a reason and our choices tend to be the reason that something good happens or something not so good occurs.
Not long ago, I heard about the concept of taking a 100% accountability in life, which rubbed me the wrong way while listening to the audiobook that was discussing it. The idea was accepting full responsibility for situations that you were involved in that did not have the desired outcomes. While many of these may not be a direct result of your action or choices, it helps you identify points where you can influence your outcomes in the future. Rather than assigning blame and continuing down the same path.
I thought this was a challenging but helpful concept because it helps one take full accountability and agency over their outcomes. Rather than expecting the world to change for them, which is not likely to happen. Even the events where you did not cause the outcomes, but you make yourself better prepared for future circumstances so that your decision making can change. Connecting this idea to something I was told in the past, the ability to succeed is not always about things going perfectly, but about identifying the critical moments and decisions that need to be made. Better known as opportunity.
During a moment of career adversity, I was asked by someone close to me about how I was not mad or resentful about the situation. I responded that my emotions about the situation would not change the matter either way. I cannot fully control what others may overlook, as they are entitled to their opinion. Rather my focus needed to be to connect with people that were seeking the skill set I developed and message how these skills would translate to value for them. That was helpful in elevating my situation well beyond what the previous path could have ever offered me.
Still learning more about this concept, but early lessons have been fruitful. There are many things in life we cannot control. But there are always choices to make situations better or change the approach to achieve what we want or need. Instead of banging our heads against a wall and hoping to find a way forward, why not change our thinking and attitudes and discover the many potential bridges that can uplift ourselves and those arounds us.
Does the idea of a 100% accountability make sense in practicality? The idea appears to be centered around taking control of your situation or giving yourself more agency over your outcomes. It can be empowering to a degree and help people to remember to not find an excuse but to find a solution.
The aspect that may be challenging is that our society is somewhat being split based on those who believe they have agency over their futures to some degree, but maybe just need some things changed, and those who feel that people are more impacted by their environment that will negate any change or personal responsibility that one may have.
All of us are impacted by how we were raised, the quality of our education, our experiences, and the environments we lived in. There is no denying that these factors matter. But there is no denying that we are equally impacted by the choices we make, the attitudes we hold, and the actions we choose to take or not take.
The idea that people are predestined to be one thing or another, good or bad, rich or poor. and that there is no changing one's fate is somewhat utopic or politically convenient. We have seen people overcome their circumstances and people who wasted away their privilege. While you may feel these cases may be an exception to the norm, they reality is that we all are impacted by our own actions and choices more than some may be willing to acknowledge.
There are no guarantees in life. We must accept that to a degree, and we see that in nature all the time. People can make all the right decisions and not have the exact same outcomes. But, that does not change the focus that the process matters and having good processes and attitudes can help overcome timing challenges and missed opportunities.
I think this mindset provides the greatest benefit to society for people to accept their responsibility to help be part of their own solutions and not just accept their fate. The reality is that there is no social program that can help uplift a person if they do not have any form of personal responsibility to meet the commitments of the program.
People can only really get the help they need if they help themselves. That is the reality that many are trying to ignore. There are things society can do more of to connect opportunity with those who are willing and able. But, we need people to be willing and able, not wanting and expecting.